Dr. June Bug Diddums here and this week we’ll talk politics! It’s time you learn the REAL history behind the Republican and Democratic parties!
Many historians attribute the birth of modern politics, and the two party system, to the ancient Greeks. Not true! The actual facts are related to the discovery of bacon. We once again find Stufi Piede tending to his Boarausauraus pen.
These early Boars, as they were called, were corralled for their fur. The carcasses were fed to their pet dogs. One day a nearby volcano erupted and a spurt of lava fell on a carcass. Over 90% of the carcass was burnt to a crisp, but what remained was a deep burgundy.
Stu’s nose was alerted first, and after a brief investigation, he was soon chewing the aromatic meat. This led to a disagreement among the families. Those who wanted to adopt the eating of meat formed the Boarausaurian party, and soon began collecting herds of Boarausauraus.
The Brontosaurian party continued to eat fruits, vegetables, and berries. So the next time you head for the polls, thank Stu Piede for his discovery of bacon!